Discover the strategies to creating lasting change in your life after divorce
After divorce, it's a time when the whole world seems to be against you. When things have been tough, and you really can't see how things are going to change. Sound familiar? Discovering the strategies to create lasting change after divorce will enable you to move forward and take your life to new heights previously not possible.
You have my sympathy and my help. The great news is, that change is not as difficult as you imagine. It's down to you and your will to believe that you can become someone different. There will be a point at which you are ready. You may be there now. I hope so because what lies in front of you is 10 times better than what has just passed. It is the rest of your relaunched life.
Reinventing yourself after divorce may seem like a daunting task, but it can be an incredibly rewarding journey of self-discovery and growth, plus it combines your newfound freedoms with a new purpose. Whether you're seeking to make profound changes in your life. Or simply want to try something new, taking the time to reinvent yourself can help you gain a deeper understanding of who you are and what you're capable of achieving. Having helped transform my life, I will share the strategies I used to help you successfully relaunch yours.
Change
To begin the process of reinventing yourself, consider what aspects of your life need to change. Probably more than you first think.
Without change, nothing changes.
When we do decide to change, and commit to it, then change happens in an instant. Change does not happen over time, thinking about change happens over time. Once you have made the decision it happens immediately.
Reflect on your career and personal interests as well as your current lack of a relationship. Try to identify the specific areas where you feel stuck or unfulfilled and need change to occur. Some possible changes might include:
Seeking a new career opportunity
Although changing jobs may not be top of your list after coming through a divorce we start to consider what lies ahead. With the divorce setting you back financially 20 years do you want to be working in the same job until you retire, just to get back what you lost? I know I didn't.
Strengthening relationships with friends and family
You may have found that many friends, especially couples, tend to give you a wide berth when you go through a divorce. I'm not sure if they worry it's catching or whether they feel their loyalties are split but for whatever reason they disappear into the shadows. Once you are back on your feet try to rekindle the friendships you once had.
Rediscovering old hobbies or pursuing new ones
You’re now free to do whatever you want whenever you want. I remember, one of the first things I did was to buy a BMW GSA1250 motorbike and tour Europe with my mates. I'm not suggesting you go out and do anything as extreme but hey, why not.
Improving your physical or emotional health
My health suffered whilst the separation was ongoing both physically and mentally. I have spent the past 3 years improving my mind and my fitness and I am now in better shape than any time in the past 20, maybe 30 years even. Get fit in your mind and body, it does wonders for your self-belief and your love life.
Finding a new partner
Although I don’t think this should be anyone’s priority, especially with a full-on relationship, you will at some point want to get back out there. Maybe have some fun but keep it casual. I'm sure the last thing you need is to be held down and back by anyone else.
Set Clear and Achievable Goals
Once you've identified areas in which you'd like to make changes, it's important to set clear goals. Take an ambitious approach to goal setting, as the saying goes, “Aim for the moon and you might just hit the stars”. Always ensure that your objectives align with your core values and desires. It’s no good building a new dream only to fall out of love with what you have created. When imagining what you want don't just think it but feel it too. Put some emotion into your thoughts and begin to feel what it will be like in your new life.
Acquire New Skills
To succeed in your reinvention, it's crucial to acquire new skills or enhance existing ones that will assist you in achieving your goals.
Financially speaking, knowing that I had to start again in my early 50s, I soon realised that by harnessing the amazing possibilities offered by computers and the internet I would have a chance of getting back what I had lost. I knew nothing, not even how to make new folders on my desktop, but I was willing to learn, mostly from YouTube. I was particularly interested in the whole YouTube channel phenomenon. People were making money through advert income and affiliate sales. I soon found myself watching hours of videos about anything to do with building a YouTube following.
Whilst I was watching one particular video, an advert popped up for a free online training course to learn marketing on the Internet.
Fast forward 24 months, and that video is the very reason I am now able to work from my laptop anywhere in the world. Writing about divorce, and coaching men just like you to succeed in building their new lives.
Today I’m sitting in my camper overlooking the sea enjoying Pizza and a beer at my favourite campsite in St David’s. Soon I'm heading over to my holiday home in Croatia for a month to catch some early-season sun. Wherever I have an internet connection, I can work for the 2/3 hours a day I need to keep things on track earning a semi-passive income. Job done. All from watching a video on YouTube and believing in myself.
I don’t want to sound smug or tell you this to try to impress, it’s more as inspiration to show what’s possible in a short space of time. I’m no different from you.
Establish Positive Habits
Positive habits can play a significant role in reinventing yourself. Try to Identify specific habits that will facilitate your growth and make a conscious effort to integrate them into your daily routine.
Allocate time for personal reflection and self-awareness exercises. Make time to think about your present day, the life you want to have tomorrow. Thinking about what you achieved, is important especially if you want to make improvements to your life. Even if it's only 5 minutes a day. Don't let life just happen, choose what life you want.
Regularly engage in physical activity and prioritize your health. Feeling great and looking good can only make you feel better about yourself.
Avoid the habits which are detrimental to your health, whether it be mind or body. Quit smoking, drinking to excess, or taking drugs. These will only bring a poorer quality of life and a poor friendship group.
Build Self-Confidence
As you reinvent yourself, it's vital to foster a sense of self-confidence. There are some great books available to read. If you would like my free guide then subscribe below. I will send you ‘Relaunching Dad's Mission Possible’ as a download.
Challenge negative thinking and focus on maintaining a positive mindset.
Leverage affirmations and self-empowering beliefs.
Believing in the process and in your ability to achieve your goals will help to motivate and sustain you throughout the journey.
Stop hanging out with negative people or those that influence you in negative ways.
Surround Yourself with Positive people and influences
Creating a supportive network is essential during your reinvention process. Build connections with inspiring people who share your interests and can offer guidance and encouragement:
Prioritize existing relationships that uplift and support your growth.
Actively seek friendships and networks with like-minded individuals.
Ditch those who undermine your newfound success and dreams.
Reinventing yourself is an empowering journey. If you truly want it, can happen in an instant. Remember, change happens in an instant. Start Now.
Define your goals and develop new skills and positive habits.
Embrace a success mindset and empower yourself to change. By doing so you will successfully embrace the new version of yourself.
Wake up every day this week feeling like you're doing something meaningful. Go out and take action toward your dream outcome. It's incredibly fulfilling when you approach this journey with a clear purpose.
Relaunch and start your Mission Possible and be prepared to thrive in your newly reinvented life!
If you would like to subscribe to my blog click the link below and as a thank you I will forward to your inbox My free 77-page book:
Relaunching Dads Mission Possible
Many thanks in advance and enjoy.
Best Ade